When Robby was born 25 years ago, our hearts were full of joy and sadness. It is amazing to me how the Lord blesses us richly with both simultaneously. We had looked forward to this treasured son with joyful anticipation, and then we said goodbye to him with quiet and unrelenting grief.

Robby’s birth, and death; Robby’s life, his immortal soul and spirit, richly blessed and solidified our family and our testimonies. His few short days with us, growing in my womb and looking intently at us in the hospital room were a testament of our Father’s love and goodness. Robby was an angel sent from God to us, and he continues to be our angel child.

It is our testimony that the hospital where Robby was born and passed away was holy ground that day. His spirit was there. The Spirit of the Lord was there. Ancestors (and probably posterity) were there. The love of the Lord was felt strongly. The compassion or the hospital staff was remarkable. Ward members surrounded us with love. The Spirit embraced us in love. There could have been no greater peace. The Lord’s promises are sure.

With empty arms, we went home. We learned to not keep our arms empty, but to love our children here more; and to love all children more. Life has become more precious and sweet. Whisperings from heaven have become more treasured and sacred. Our goal to persevere and remain faithful has become more solidified, because we want to be with Robby again, as we do with all of our family members.

Had Robby’s mission been to stay and grow to adulthood, he would be turning 25 on 8 February 2018. Heavenly Father’s plan was for Robby to return home to heaven. That temporary loss still saddens us at times, but we have faith in our Father’s Plan.

This year I would like to invite you to celebrate Robby’s birth with us. It would me a lot to me if you do. I’m not asking you to donate money to a charitable cause; but if that is what you choose to do, that is wonderful.

What I’d like, as a gift to Robby and his parents and family who have missed him, is for you to notice the children around you. Please think of something special you can do for a child. Whether it is taking him or her sledding, or baking cookies, or teaching him how to fly a kite, or reading a story with her; please spend some time in February showing your love to children.

Life is precious. This life is short; but, eternity is our promise. Love is everlasting.

Happy Birthday, Sweet Robby.

Another Year 2015

Heidi 

22 October 1961

19 1/2 inches long

7 lbs. 2 oz.

I recently had a birthday. My birthday is four days after my mother's. So I was in Utah with her this year. Both of our birthdays passed rather uneventfully. We knew that her days were truly numbered, and her greatest desire was to move on in her journey. 

I am still her baby daughter, and I miss her so much. I am thankful for the life that she gave me and the love that I have always felt from her and from my father. It seems that one's childhood is not truly over until his or her parents have passed on. 

I believe that my parents' generation is one of the very best. They were the workers. They gave us everything that we've built upon and we take credit for it. Yet, without them, we are nothing. 

So now with a broken heart, I need to take the torch and carry on. Some have asked me how I am doing. I'm doing well, and I'm not doing well. In fact, I am broken. But I know from past experience, it is when we are broken that the Lord can do the most good with us. So I hang onto that hope, knowing that one day I'll see my mother again, my sister and my brother, my son, my Nana, and my Oma; and all the rest of my family, those in heaven and those still here currently. 

I pray that I'll have the desire to use my energy wisely and do some good in this world, and love the living of it. 

The Gift of Faith

What is the greatest gift that I can give 

to myself and to my children?

The greatest gift that I can give is my faith in Jesus Christ. Why is this such a great gift?

Jesus Christ gave us life, and when we believe in Him, He gives us life even more abundantly. It is through Him that we all have life, the ability to think, and move, and do. And it is because of Him that we have the right to choose to believe or to not believe in His gracious gift and His never-ending love.

He is The Light of the World, and His light is manifest in all of His creations. Through Him we have life and without Him we do not. Even when we deny Him, He causes His sun to shine and his rain to fall on both the righteous and the unrighteous, the believers and the non-believers, because He is good and He loves us all.

To reap the blessings of His goodness while refusing to recognize His gifts shows lack of knowledge and absence of faith. To lay claim on the goodness within ourselves while denying Him shows an attitude of arrogance with misdirected praise.

The world teaches that people can be good in and of themselves whether they believe in God or not. But this reasoning is faulty. While people may believe that they are good on their own, they cannot even exist on their own. We all need God. The goodness that is inside us is from God even if we don't recognize it or Him.

Why is my faith in Jesus Christ important to me and why do I think that it is important to you? Jesus Christ wants our success. He loves us. He created this beautiful world in which we live, and He allows us experiences that build our character and bring us joy. More than that! He has our backs. He has paid the ultimate price, so that each time we fall, He is personally there to catch us and lift us back up. My faith in Jesus Christ is important, because I know He loves me and that He has redeemed me and that He will continue to redeem me; and He has and will do the same for you. His love knows no limits, even when ours is shaky at best. His power, His mercy, His love, and His glory are everlasting.

The hope that I have for happiness in my life stems from the faith I have in Jesus Christ and His promises. The hope that I have in my family and our happiness now and in our relationships in eternity are founded in His glorious gospel and the covenants and ordinances that He has provided to me for my safety and eternal progression.

We may think that we don’t need God and that we don’t need God’s Son. But do we need the air that we breathe? Because if we do, then we need Him. King Benjamin’s words are words of pleading, because He too knew that the greatest gift that He could give His people was His faith in Jesus Christ:

“Believe in God; believe that he is, and that he created all things, both in heaven and in earth; believe that he has all wisdom, and all power, both in heaven and in earth; believe that man doth not comprehend all the things which the Lord can comprehend.

“And again, believe that ye must repent of your sins and forsake them, and humble yourselves before God; and ask in sincerity of heart that he would forgive you; and now, if you believe all these things see that ye do them” (Mosiah 4:9-10).

Our good works are nothing without the goodness that He has poured into us through His creation and His sustaining power. Our haughty and our sincere efforts pale in comparison to the work of His atoning sacrifice for us, which gives us the power to be able to be good.

“I say unto you, my brethren, that if you should render all the thanks and praise which your whole soul has power to possess, to that God who has created you, and has kept and preserved you, and has caused that ye should rejoice, and has granted that ye should live in peace one with another—

"I say unto you that if ye should serve him who has created you from the beginning, and is preserving you from day to day, by lending you breath, that ye may live and move and do according to your own will, and even supporting you from one moment to another—I say, if ye should serve him with all your whole souls yet ye would be unprofitable servants.

“And behold, all that he requires of you is to keep his commandments; and he has promised you that if ye would keep his commandments ye should prosper in the land; and he never doth vary from that which he hath said; therefore, if ye do keep his commandments he doth bless you and prosper you.

“And now, in the first place, he hath created you, and granted unto you your lives, for which ye are indebted unto him.

“And secondly, he doth require that ye should do as he hath commanded you; for which if ye do, he doth immediately bless you; and therefore he hath paid you. And ye are still indebted unto him, and are, and will be, forever and ever; therefore, of what have ye to boast?

“And now I ask, can ye say aught of yourselves? I answer you, Nay. Ye cannot say that ye are even as much as the dust of the earth; yet ye were created of the dust of the earth; but behold, it belongeth to him who created you” (Mosiah 2:20-26).

I love Jesus, and the best gift that I can give myself and others is my faith in Him. King Benjamin was not emphasizing the unimportance of men, but the importance of Jesus Christ in our daily lives. Even though He makes His sun to rise and His rain to fall to bless us, we cannot count on Him giving us the gift of peace in this life and eternal life with Him and with our families in the next life if we do not love Him and keep His commandments. And that takes faith. Holding on to my faith and living my belief in Jesus Christ is the most important thing I can do and the very best gift that I have to give.

I am thankful for the many gifts God has given me: life, agency, family, friends, peace, faith, resurrection, and the prospect of eternal happiness and joy. I love my family; I love my friends; I love my Heavenly Father; and I love His Son, my Savior, the Lord Jesus Christ.It is because of Him that I am able to enjoy everything else. 

When we are sad and feel alone, we just need to listen for our Father's voice. He loves us, and it will be all right.

Abortion and Trafficking Children

Thoughts on Abortion and Trafficking Dead Children

(Shortened link for this post: http://tinyurl.com/opovckp)

The recent exposure of the inhumane trafficking of human baby parts is soul stirring, or at least it should be. Some say that it's merely propaganda, and that the presentation is given out of context. It really doesn't matter. There is enough evidence against Planned Parenthood, and the practice of abortion for that matter, for those who value life to know that the slaughtering of babies and the trafficking of their body parts for both commercial and scientific gain is evil. A society that does not value the life of an unborn baby, but places value on his or her dismembered body, is not a civilized society.

I can't help but think of Martin Luther King, Jr.'s Speech. Do we have a dream of brotherhood? Do we? For all of those who speak about rights, please note that abortion is a wrong. How can all children walk hand-in-hand when their hands are torn off before they are even born? Whether you believe that there are exceptions to rules or not, there are rules of civility and ethical rightness. No matter what anyone believes about equality, all choices are not equal, which means that all outcomes are not equal either. Ending life will never be equal with giving life. Even without organized religion, every human being is born with the Light of Christ. We all must know that ripping a child limb from limb is wrong. When abortion is accepted as a mores of society, not only are those facing abortion at risk of losing life, but civility itself is lost; and civilization is following suit.

Abortion is the greatest evil to ever happen in this Country. Yet we condone or accept it. We hear the same old rhetoric over and over. Some defend all abortions for the few extreme cases. Killing millions of babies in order to secure the right to get rid of a few pregnancies that are due to rape, incest, or illness is bizarre. For those of us who were reared in civilized homes, were we not taught the importance of life and love? Do we not realize that life itself is more important than the length of life, or what some people would deem the quality of life? Certainly, the life of a child is more important than his or her flesh made dead through an abortion.

I had an emergency C-section with my fifth child. When I was eight months pregnant, the specialist told me that he did't think the baby had any kidneys, so did I want to just have him naturally since he'd die anyway? Are you kidding me? I am his mother. Why would I want to terminate his life purposefully and perhaps prematurely? Why would a doctor? Isn't a doctor's concern to protect and preserve life? Was my son's life of less value than mine, or yours, or the doctor's? No his life held significance, and he left a positive imprint in the lives of many.

Even at six months into my pregnancy, I knew that our son had some problems, but I did not know that he wouldn't be able to live long after birth. Should I have ripped him apart because of that, or burned him with saline solution? No way. I enjoyed each time he rolled or kicked and every single ultra sound. Would it have been easier for me to have aborted him than to have lost him two months later? By no means; No. There is healing in love, even when there is pain. For the poor women who have chosen abortion, there is just pain.

While some cry that the current undercover videos exposing Planned Parenthood are merely propaganda, I can agree that the presentation may be propaganda; but I won't agree that the content isn't true. How long will we idly stand by, burying our heads in the sand, while millions of unborn children are massacred? This is happening. It has been happening since the 70's. Children are burned, torn apart and slaughtered while yet alive. It is gruesome. I don't need to watch videos, whether in or out of context, to inform me how evil Planned Parenthood is or how evil it is that any thinking and feeling human being can become so clouded and calloused in his or her judgement to call mass murder freedom of choice. This should sicken us all.

Legalizing things that are clearly unlawful will never make them ethical or good. Not yesterday, not now, not ever. I can only hope that some good will come from these disturbing undercover videos which show the true nature of this wicked practice and evil organization. Maybe, just maybe, some people will finally understand that these are babies with body parts the same as you and me. They are not merely tissue. They are real. And their souls have value.

I believe that shedding innocent blood ranks up there with crucifying our innocent Lord. And still He reaches out to us to forgive us. But we had better hope that He doesn't say, “Father, they knew what they were doing.”

Do you see a contradiction in supporting Planned Parenthood and in valuing human life? I do, and I know others that do as well. There are those like me who have lost sons or daughters way too soon, who would have done everything possible to keep them here with us. So it is difficult for me when I see people still supporting the killing of their own babies, or even saying, “I don't agree with the practice for myself, but I think everyone should have the right to choose.” To choose murder? Really?

Everyone should have the right to choose whether or not to have sex. Beyond that, take responsibility and be an adult.

Whether you think that these babies' body parts are being trafficked for money or not, why are they used at all? I personally have the right to say whether my organs are used for someone else or for science, should I die an accidental death. Life is sacred, and my body is mine. But these babies are being denied the right to life, and their “tissue” is not even considered theirs. It truly, truly is sick.

So when we consider checking the facts, we might actually begin by checking our own consciences, even before we check the news media, right or left; because, it looks like the “right in our society “left” a long time ago. We might actually try using our hearts along with our minds to consider why our own lives have value, and why we should extend that value to every other human being, both those born, and those waiting to be born.

The safety of all children is important. Where there is life, there is hope.

I have personally taken the time to write these thoughts and to contact the Representatives and Senators for my state. Please do the same. We need to take a stand, and we need to walk hand-in-hand.

Contact Your State Representatives

Contact Your State Senators

And If That Mockingbird Won't Sing

And If That Mockingbird Won’t Sing

Part 1:

Our cat has been leaving us far too many presents this spring.

Yesterday my husband was downstairs before me. When I joined him, he told me that he wished he’d had his camera. Two mockingbirds were taunting our cat incessantly. He hadn’t fed the cat yet, so I fed her. Since he plays the organ at church, he left for church before my daughter and me as well.

We were running a bit late, but I thought that we’d make it in time for Sacrament Meeting. When we got in the car though, we saw the mockingbirds pecking at our cat who was just hanging out on the front fence. I decided to get her off the fence, so I went in the house and opened the back door, and she immediately ran to me.

I grabbed some treats to put in her food dish. And that is when I noticed that there were two baby mockingbirds just outside the back door. I’d missed them before, so I don’t know if they were both there or only one of them. Now that would explain the mockingbirds’ behavior. Oh, I was so sad.

I went back to the car and told Christine that we were already too late. I told her that there were two baby mockingbirds outside the back door, and that one of them was still alive. At that point, I knew that we needed to go see how that mockingbird faired and if there was something we could do. If there are hurt animals, Christine will help them.

I put the cat in the bathroom and buried the dead little bird. I got Christine a pair of garden gloves to use in attending to the live bird, but she already had it in her hands when I approached her with them. So I found a pot that had soil in it, laid the gloves on it, making a bed for the wee bird.

Although the bird was scratched in a few places, it is a fighter. It opened its big yellow beak (big in comparison to its small body), searching for free food. We gave it a couple of drops of water. Christine looked in the bramble bush where we thought the nest might be (because the birds seemed to be guarding it), but we couldn’t see anything.

With the cat out of the way, we found a shaded spot next to the bush to put the flower pot, and we left for church. We missed the opening, the sustainings, and even the sacrament; but, at least momentarily, we saved a life. “Is it lawful to save a life on the Sabbath day?”

Upon returning from church, we made it our priority to attend to the baby bird. Still alive. Still wanting food. I tried to grind up some bird seed in water. Not effective. So I also added some whey protein and ground again, and then I strained out the bird seed, just leaving the liquid. The bird took a couple of drops of that.

Bob put the flower pot on one of the pillars to our patio cover, out of the cat’s reach. Christine was still searching for its nest, and not finding it, she was searching for a better location. She didn’t want the bird to survive, only to fall directly into the cat’s mouth as a fledgling.

Before checking on the cat and allowing her back outside, we made a nest out of an Easter basket. Christine had researched what to feed the bird, and I knew it needed protein. She found it should be given egg and cat food. I added an egg to the whey mixture and gave the bird another couple of drops. (It pooped.) We added shredded paper to the basket and weaved yarn into it so that it could be attached to the tree. After adding some grass to the new basket, and positioning it between two branches, we tied it securely with the yarn. Then Christine gently transferred the baby bird to its new nest.

Christine did not want me to check on the bird again, but she continued to search for a nest. An hour or so later, I pulled over the step ladder and checked on the bird. It was still opening wide its mouth and I gave it another drop or two. Mouth closed. I went back inside.

After another hour or so, Christine ran into the house excitedly. She had pinpointed where the nest was in the bramble bush. She had been watching the parent birds and allowed them to lead her to the nest. So then we worked to initiate the transfer. We had to cut the basket out of the tree. By this time the bird wasn’t very active. I think more than anything, it was getting later in the day and the bird was cold. Christine returned her (I keep wanted to write her, and not it, so this time I did) to her nest alongside the two other babies already there. (It had been a typical brood with four babies.)

All evening the mockingbirds still attacked the cat. By bedtime we did not know where she had gone. But the birds were quiet as well, so we had to hope that all were safe for the night.

This morning I was happy not to find any present at the back door. It’s always wonderful to not start out the day with mortification. We worked hard to give that baby a fighting chance. It’s up to the parents and nature now. We really don’t know if it’s maimed and can’t survive or of its parents will reject it. But her wings and legs seemed functional from what we could observe when she was stretching for food.

As soon as I fed the cat this morning, a mockingbird was pecking at her, not allowing her to eat. Hopefully, their revenge won’t bring about their demise; and, hopefully, this little bird family will make it through the season. For now the cat is in the bathroom and would rather be outside.

Part 2:

Lessons in Nature:

Babies come to earth with a desire to live. Parents give and protect life. Predators take life. Parents instinctively defend their families, even at peril to themselves. Parenthood is never about personal convenience.

Sometimes it appears that there is more fierce loyalty in the animal kingdom than among humans. These birds devote their entire lives to nest building, having broods, sustaining life, and protecting their young.

With the very tenderness of the human heart, we can all feel sympathy for the little baby mockingbird. I do not know many who would not hope for the survival of a baby bird and who would not feel saddened to see a bird that had been hurt by the claws of a cat. Yet how many human babies have been aborted? And how many human babies have suffered great atrocities at the hands of their own parents and physician, both of which by very definition should be offering them life and protecting their lives at all costs? And how much greater is a human’s life in the eyes of our Lord?

Let’s allow the babies to have a voice and to hear the mockingbirds sing.

 

Life is Good

My declaration: I do believe in a Deity. I believe in the God of Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob. I believe in the Supreme Creator of the universe. I believe in the Father of our spirits. I believe in the Giver of all good gifts, including life itself. "We believe in God the Eternal Father, and in His Son Jesus Christ, and in the Holy Ghost." (Joseph Smith, see Articles of Faith)

I believe in the power of creation. I belief that God has given us life and agency and, along with that, the ability to redefine ourselves and recreate who we are from day to day by the choices we make, the things we think (including the books we read or the blogs we write), and the deeds we do. Hence, when we feel to proclaim, "Life is good," it can very well be because we feel good about our choices and the direction we are headed.

But I affirm that "life" itself is good. The length of life or the quality of life, according to worldly standards of health, doesn't matter. Life is good! I believe that is because God is good, and whatsoever comes from God is good. (See James 1:17-18)

I feel to exclaim that life is and was good for my infant son who just lived 2 1/2 hours. I know that he was grateful to receive a mortal body, that his spirit lives on, and that he will take up his physical body again in the resurrection. This faith I have because I believe in the resurrection of Christ. Indeed, life is good. Our Father who has granted us earthly life, immortality, and the possibility of eternal life is good.

I am glad for the knowledge that I have of a pre-earth life, this earthly life, and life beyond death. Life is a miracle; in all of its stages, it remains a miracle. It is not something that mortal man can copy. But as children of God, we have the seeds of deity right within us, and He has permitted us to have the power of procreation wherein we can help provide His spirit children with physical bodies. Life and the power to perpetuate life is truly a gift.

For all the dear family members that I have said good-bye to for a time, I do believe and I must believe I will see you again! I feel it in my heart, and the Spirit testifies to my spirit that it is so. I feel the warmth of the testimony coursing through my veins. Both you and this testimony are an essential part of who I am. I know that Ed’s life is not snuffed out; nor is Robby’s; nor is my dear sister Kathy’s. Life is good; they are good; and they continue in God who is not only good, but great.

Tears flow freely as a think about my recently departed sister. She indeed had a testimony that life is good. I never once saw her bitter. Her circumstances or the quality of her life did not affect her testimony that life is good. Not once did she want people to feel sorry for her or pity her. She loved life; she loved her family and friends; and she was the best example of creating an atmosphere of happiness and faith no matter what. She even went so far as to say her cancer was kind. Why? Because it gave her time to concentrate on all the things that matter most and to have a couple more years to really enjoy her family, friends, and this beautiful world that we live in. Also, because she knew that cancer was not going to really bring an end to her life, but that life would and does continue for her. She believes in the resurrection as do I. I hope that I can face the challenges of life as well as she did with this motto: “Come what may and love it.” (Joseph B. Worthlin, see Article from October 2008 Conference)

I am so thankful to have the gift of life. I know that God who is the Creator gave me life. I know that I do not have the power to even maintain life on my own, but that He is the one who sustains me from day to day by giving me breath and nourishment through this beautiful earth on which we live. (See Mosiah 2:20-22, word from King Benjamin.)

So whether my individual days are good days or bad days, I do proclaim that life is good. We do experience joys and sorrows, and often there is sorrow mixed in with our joys. But even in the midst of sorrows, I feel my Savior’s love, and I still do proclaim, “Life is good.” I find that the sorrows help me to remember Him and to value life more. And when everything seems to be going along perfectly, I hope that I will do better at stopping to be thankful to Him and to those who have enriched my life and blessed me to be able to enjoy all the wonderful things I enjoy. I acknowledge that I am nothing of myself. But because God has chosen me to be His daughter, and because I have loving earthly parents, loving family, and friends, I have been nurtured in the good things of life and my possibilities for progression are endless. This gift is from my Father who is Eternal and whose gifts are Endless.