Motherhood

Thoughts on Motherhood

All I ever really wanted most to be was a mother. With any other interest, talent, or desire that I’ve had, motherhood was the greatest desire of my heart. I’m so glad that God granted me this blessing, with six children of my own and other children whom I’ve taught and who have taught and blessed me. It is a privilege and an honor.

Here I am with my firstborn. Now she is ready to deliver her firstborn very soon. How grandchildren bless our lives! George will be our fifth grandchild and second grandson. 

This weekend marks the first Mother’s Day with my own mother departed from this earth. I am so thankful for her love and example to me, and I am thankful for my grandmothers and their love and support throughout my life. I am also thankful for my dear mother-in-law and her accepting me as her own with great love and cheerfulness. And I’m thankful for my husband’s grandmothers as well. How I miss every single one of these mothers.

I had the greatest privilege of serving my mother in her last days here on earth. I enjoyed her mothering then as always, and in the moments when the roles reversed a little, I was thankful to serve the woman who had always so selflessly done everything for me and who continues to be a blessing to me every moment of my life.

I am also thankful for my sisters and the part that they have played in loving and mothering me. I miss them too. Fortunately, I can still call and visit two of them. The other one I visit in memory, love, and tears.

I am also blessed with three beautiful talented daughters. They are all contributing to the blessings of motherhood according to the time frames of their own lives and their individual talents in significant ways. I also have two beautiful daughters-in-law who are wonderful mothers. It pleases me and warms my heart to see the rising generation full of love and service for children and their fellow men. My sons are also a great blessing to their own children, family, and friends; and they value and support their wives in their roles as mothers by being wonderful fathers too.

I must say how thankful I am for the Gospel of Jesus Christ which has everything to do with families; and I am thankful for the role that motherhood plays in unfolding God’s Plan of Salvation for His children. How blessed we are for Mother Eve and the part she played in establishing the human family, and for Father Adam, with his exactness and honor in accepting the Plan and supporting Eve in her role of motherhood. I am most thankful of all for my Lord and Savior Jesus Christ for giving us the gift of life, and that eternally through His offering of His soul and body to save ours. Because of Him, families are forever, and motherhood is eternal.

This was of utmost significance when our son Robby returned to heaven shortly after birth. But the significance is no less diminished with each and every individual who holds a place in our hearts. God established families and gave us the privilege of participating in His glory through experiencing motherhood and fatherhood. And if these are the things which we value most, He will bless us with the privilege of the continuation of family lives forever.

Motherhood isn’t easy. There are so many challenges. But it has to be the most rewarding calling there has ever been. Inside this bosom of mine, motherhood is most precious and prized, and my children’s happiness is my greatest desire. I love being a mother.

An Angel Kiss

There are Angels Among Us

Recently my dear mother passed away. Even though I know that it is temporary, it has been one of the greatest losses I have ever felt. There are so many intricacies linked to who I am and to how I became me that all revolve around her. She probably is nearer to me now, and can help me more, than she could in her last few years; but the absence of her physical presence leaves my heart wounded.

She’s an angel now, as ever she has been. And I have to acknowledge that even though I cannot see her, she still lives on in and through Jesus Christ just as we all do. My sadness should be washed away in the face of all the goodness I still see and feel all around me. In time, in the Lord’s time, all tears will be washed away (see Revelation 21:4). So I have to believe that even my sadness can serve a heavenly purpose if I turn to Him.

It was a blessing for me to be able to spend the last three weeks of my mother’s life with her and near her. I saw more of her unblemished soul in such a purified state. Her body was old and done, but her angel spirit was true and pure. Oh, how I long to be more like her.

The family time during these weeks and the couple weeks after her death are priceless. I’m glad that I could visit with siblings. I’m glad that the funeral went according to my mother’s plans. I’m glad for the memories and love shared. I’m glad for the tender, loving example of my father who willingly gave his wife back to the Lord.

And then I had to drive back home. That was hard. It was hard to leave my childhood home and my family of origin, knowing that next time I return, my mother will not be there to welcome me.

My husband had left all the mail on the table before he took a flight to come for the funeral time. So when I got home, there was a small pile of mail waiting for me to open.

And there was a package. In opening this gift from one of my dearest friends, I was reminded, that there are indeed angels among us, both seen and unseen, both mortal and immortal; and Christ’s love is watching over us and protecting and healing us all.

I opened this small present to find a charm bracelet. It’s made by Hallmark, and it has a Hershey kiss on it. When I first looked at it, I did not see a kiss; I saw an angel. I thought that the link was a head, the kiss was the robed body, and the Hershey tag was the wings. I still see it that way as well as the kiss. To me this bracelet represents both an angel and a kiss of friendship; or even more than that, it’s an angel’s kiss. I cherish my friendship with the angel who sent me this bracelet; and I will be reminded of her healing thoughtfulness each time I look at it and wear it.

The gifts we give each other do more good than we ever realize. My friend’s gift to me is a reminder of that. If we will be sensitive in following the Holy Spirit, our gifts will be timely and healing and far-reaching; and we will be as angels to one another, as we aid each other on our mortal journey.

So thank you, Dear Friend, for the angel kiss. Besides being a representation of your friendship to me; it will be a representation of all the angels in my life, in earthly or heavenly form that I cannot see daily. And as I see the bracelet and feel it on my wrist I will know that angels are near and that the Lord’s love and mercy are always with me, and he will always send his angels to be beside me.

Hebrews 13:2:

2 Be not forgetful to entertain strangers: for thereby some have entertained angels unawares.

For Christmas, my friend sent me a heart bead for the bracelet with the word love on it. Because that was God’s first Christmas present to us; He loved us so He sent His Son.

John 3:16-17:

16 ¶For God so loved the world, that he gave his onlybegotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have everlasting life.

17 For God sent not his Son into the world to condemn the world; but that the world through him might be saved.

Another Year 2015

Heidi 

22 October 1961

19 1/2 inches long

7 lbs. 2 oz.

I recently had a birthday. My birthday is four days after my mother's. So I was in Utah with her this year. Both of our birthdays passed rather uneventfully. We knew that her days were truly numbered, and her greatest desire was to move on in her journey. 

I am still her baby daughter, and I miss her so much. I am thankful for the life that she gave me and the love that I have always felt from her and from my father. It seems that one's childhood is not truly over until his or her parents have passed on. 

I believe that my parents' generation is one of the very best. They were the workers. They gave us everything that we've built upon and we take credit for it. Yet, without them, we are nothing. 

So now with a broken heart, I need to take the torch and carry on. Some have asked me how I am doing. I'm doing well, and I'm not doing well. In fact, I am broken. But I know from past experience, it is when we are broken that the Lord can do the most good with us. So I hang onto that hope, knowing that one day I'll see my mother again, my sister and my brother, my son, my Nana, and my Oma; and all the rest of my family, those in heaven and those still here currently. 

I pray that I'll have the desire to use my energy wisely and do some good in this world, and love the living of it. 

I'm Thankful for Mom

I am thankful that Mom converted to the Church at 16-years-old. I am thankful that she already had studied the Bible and recognized the truth. I am thankful that she left old family traditions that were detrimental in that past and carried good family traditions with us into the future.

I am thankful that Mom answered the many questions that I had as a followed her around the house. I am thankful that Mom taught me how to work in the house and in the yard. I am thankful that she taught me the importance of play. I am thankful that she always offered ways to earn some extra money when we wanted it for something good.

I am thankful that Mom was careful when necessary and daring when adventures were necessary. I am thankful that she jumped off the cliff into the Green River, so that I had to do so, to prove that I wouldn’t be outdone by Mom in front of my peers. I am thankful that she dove off of high dive, so I would, too. I am thankful that she made me speak for myself on the phone and at other times.

I am thankful that Mom took me to Church. I am thankful that Mom encouraged me to learn, but never pushed me too hard. I am thankful that Mom believed in Mental Health Days and allowed me to spend time at home with her when I didn’t really feel like being at school. (No, this didn’t happen too often; but back then, the school districts did not claim ownership of the child.)

I am thankful that Mom sought out ways to give me opportunities that she never had herself, and she made them happen. I am thankful that Mom let me make my own choices and choose my own friends. I am thankful that Mom taught me to see the value in all people.

I am thankful that Mom has always loved me. I love you, Mom.