Combating Negative Thoughts with Positive Ones

I am a part-time missionary at the Redlands Mission Office. Since I work among valiant young missionaries, and because we’ve sent children on missions and been involved as ward and stake missionaries; and since I have personally felt the taxation of worries, anxiety, frustration, and depression, I would like to share some thoughts concerning personal revival and restoration.

Outside the Redlands Mission Office

As missionaries, as parents of missionaries, as students, as employees, as children, as parents, we all have to deal with many challenges. As sons and daughters of God our Heavenly Father, and as recipients of the benefits of the Atonement of His Son Jesus Christ, we have been greatly equipped to face these challenges; but we must remember that we cannot do it alone. The Lord is always there, and the Lord has given us many helpers. We should not discount any of them.

First off, I want to express that emotions are normal. Do not be harsh with yourself because you have feelings. Our Father is not a God who is without body, parts, or passions; and, we are created in His image and endowed with His traits. Jesus certainly was not exempt from emotions. He carried with Him a great weight in being the Savior of the World. He was known as “A Man of Sorrows, and acquainted with grief.” (See Isaiah 53:3) If we are to become like Him, can we expect to not have seasons when we are also affected by these emotions? Yet, He is there to offer us relief.

Because Jesus carried the weight of the world, you do not have to.

“Come unto me, all ye that labour and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you, and learn of me; for I am meek and lowly in heart: and ye shall find rest unto your souls. For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light” (Matthew 11:28-30).

What did Jesus do when He felt overwhelmed, when He was tired and drawn out, when the cares of the day rested heavily upon Him? He went by Himself apart in a mountain area to pray (See Matthew 14:23). After spending the day feeding everyone else, Jesus also needed spiritual nourishment and renewal; and He went to His Father to obtain it.

While we cannot always physically go to a mountaintop or attend a temple, we can always go spiritually and mentally there as we direct our thoughts and the longings of our hearts to the Lord.

Now Satan wants to cause us great grief and discouragement. I know that especially in my young life, he worked mightily to make me think improper thoughts and to dissuade me from faith and from joy. He still is at his mischief with all of us. He sits back and watches and assesses our weaknesses, and then it is his delight to tempt us and to try us based on those. He even did so with the Savior.

When Jesus was tired, hungry, and spent from forty days of fasting and being with God, Satan came to dissuade him from His purpose. Have you seen that in your own lives? Spiritual work is physically taxing. It is important to analyze carefully our Saviors actions (See Matthew Chapter 4).

Because Jesus was hungry, Satan tempted Him to make stones into bread. What did Jesus do? He quoted scripture!

“It is written, Man shall not live by bread alone, but by every word that proceedeth out of the mouth of God” (Matthew 4:4).

Because Jesus was the Son of God, Satan tempted Him with the improper use of power. What did Jesus do? He quoted scripture!

“It is written again, Thou shalt not tempt the Lord thy God” (Matthew 4:7).

Then Satan tempted Jesus with riches and glory. What did Jesus do? He rebuked Satan, and He quoted scripture!

“Get thee hence, Satan: for it is written, Thou shalt worship the Lord thy God, and him only shalt thou serve” (Matthew 4:10).

Then in verse 11, a great blessing followed:

“Then the devil leaveth him, and, behold, angels came and ministered unto him.”

Moroni expresses the importance of remaining faithful in order to receive blessings. In the examples above, we witness Jesus being faithful three times. We know that He had to be faithful more often than that, and so do we. We may have to repeat over and over the same actions to show to ourselves and to the Lord that we are faithful.

“And now, I, Moroni, would speak somewhat concerning these things; I would show unto the world that faith is things which are hoped for and not seen; wherefore, dispute not because ye see not, for ye receive no witness until after the trial of your faith” (Ether 12:6).

My daughter who is currently serving a mission was promised by our Stake President that angels from her own family would be there to assist her at times. I believe that this blessing is valid for all of us as we remain faithful to the covenants we make and as we practice our faith in the Lord through humility, desire, and obedience.

Even more importantly, we are promised by the Savior that if we always remember Him, we will always have His Spirit to be with us. The Sacrament Prayers are an important thing for us to remember and review, not only on the Sabbath days, but whenever we need to draw on the blessings of the Atonement. (See Moroni chapters 4 and 5)

Second then, we must remember that our thoughts are powerful things. Though they may be persistent, we must do want we can to control them and to think proper thoughts. We can be more persistent than our thoughts. Again, we do not have to be alone in this, but should welcome the help of family, friends, therapists, medical staff, and most importantly the Lord. Our thoughts have the greatest influence on our emotions, our actions, and our reactions.

In Proverbs 3:7, we read, “For as he thinketh in his heart, so is he.”

Why is that? Because our thoughts determine our feelings, our attitudes, our actions, and even our faith. Our thoughts can lift us up or drag us down. But, we can follow the Lord’s example and turn to the Lord’s servants for direction.

How about this primary song? Hum Your Favorite Hymn

1. If on occasion you have found

Your language is in question,

Or ugly thoughts come to your mind,

Then here's a good suggestion.

Chorus: Just hum your favorite hymn,

Sing out with vigor and vim,

And you will find it clears your mind.

Hum your favorite hymn.

2. Before you say an angry word,

Remember you'll regret it,

For once it's said the harm is done,

And some folks won't forget it.

Words: Marilyn Price Adams

Music: K. Newell Dayley


This song was inspired by a talk given by Elder Boyd K. Packer entitled, “Inspiring Music—Worthy Thoughts.”

In this talk, Elder Packer said this,

"I want to tell you young people about one way you can learn to control your thoughts, and it has to do with music…

"This is what I would teach you. Choose from among the sacred music of the Church a favorite hymn, one with words that are uplifting and music that is reverent, one that makes you feel something akin to inspiration. Remember President Lee’s counsel; perhaps “I Am A Child of God” would do. Go over it in your mind carefully. Memorize it. Even though you have had no musical training, you can think through a hymn.

"Now, use this hymn as the place for your thoughts to go. Make it your emergency channel. Whenever you find these shady actors have slipped from the sidelines of your thinking onto the stage of your mind, put on this record, as it were.

"As the music begins and as the words form in your thoughts, the unworthy ones will slip shamefully away. It will change the whole mood on the stage of your mind. Because it is uplifting and clean, the baser thoughts will disappear. For while virtue, by choice, will not associate with filth, evil cannot tolerate the presence of light.

"In due time you will find yourself, on occasion, humming the music inwardly. As you retrace your thoughts, you discover some influence from the world about you encouraged an unworthy thought to move on stage in your mind, and the music almost automatically began."

I know that this may sound oversimplified to someone who is suffering anxiety or depression, but I think that it applies to all of us. This counsel was given by an Apostle of the Lord. By sharing this, I am not at all suggesting that you try to go it alone. We have many helpers in this world who are blessed with much light, knowledge, and truth. When help is offered us in a righteous way, and we are following the Spirit, we should accept help.

When I was young and I was trying my very hardest to think appropriate thoughts and do appropriate things, I found that while Satan could not reach me during the day, he would try to do so in my dreams at night. This is frightening, and I hope that it is not happening to you. But I do have some suggestions.

My suggestions are the same as those above.

Missionaries are especially busy doing the Lord’s work all day long. I would suspect that those who are dealing with fearful thoughts, or who are experiencing anxiety, frustration, or depression, may have the heaviest load during their nighttime preparations, in restless sleep, or during their waking hours.

So before you go to bed and when you wake up, make sure that you have a devotional time that you spend with the Lord in prayer and in positive memorization and self-talk. If you are working on memorizing hymns and scriptures, and if you are developing an “I can” attitude, you will feel more secure and healthful.

During your personal scripture study, pay attention to those verses that strike you as important and work on memorizing them early in the morning and before you go to bed. Do the same thing with the hymns that bring you peace. I am working on doing this myself; because I want more peace and joy in my own life.

These are the first ones that I am going to work on. Your list may be different. Let the Spirit guide your choices.

The Lord’s Prayer

The 23rd Psalm

Lead, Kindly Light

The Lord is my Light

I would suggest that you read and sing aloud, even if at times it is in a whisper. Your own voice will become a voice of comfort as you hear the encouraging words of scripture and hymns, and your will build confidence in your own abilities to draw upon good and uplifting thoughts.

As your choices become memorized and familiar, and you are finding that these reassurances are automatic to you when you need them, add a new verse and a new hymn to your morning and evening devotionals, and keep it up. You will have a repertoire of sacred personal material always available to drawn on for personal strength.

Also, allow yourself to have joy in your successes. Ammon did (See Alma 26).

“Therefore, let us glory, yea, we will glory in the Lord; yea, we will rejoice, for our joy is full; yea, we will praise our God forever. Behold, who can glory too much in the Lord? Yea, who can say too much of his great power, and of his mercy, and of his long-suffering towards the children of men? Behold, I say unto you, I cannot say the smallest part which I feel” (Alma 26:16).

That brings me to gladness. Eleonar H. Porter teaches us much about gladness in Pollyanna. Pollyanna really wanted to receive a doll for Christmas; but, all that was in the missionary barrel for her was a pair crutches. Pollyanna’s dad taught her to look on the bright side of things. She developed the Glad Game and soon transformed not only herself, but her whole community.

We are told, “And in nothing doth man offend God, or against none is his wrath kindled, save those who confess not his hand in all things, and obey not his commandments” (Doctrine and Covenants 59: 21).

Gratitude is that important. We need to express it in order to gain God’s favor.

The Lord gives us this promise, “And he who receiveth all things with thankfulness shall be made glorious; and the things of this earth shall be added unto him, even an hundred fold, yea, more” (Doctrine and Covenants 78:19).

So with your devotions to your Heavenly Father take the time to express your gratitude. You may need to do this both in your prayers and in your journal. Make sure that you express gratitude to others as well. Gratitude will make you feel lighter and it will transform you into a delightful person.

Finally, do not condemn yourself because of your weaknesses. The Lord would not want that. He is always there for us, with His hand stretched out still. His desire is always our ultimate happiness and success; and He is there to help us achieve that as we turn to Him!

“And if men come unto me I will show unto them their weakness. I give unto men weakness that they may be humble; and my grace is sufficient for all men that humble themselves before me; for if they humble themselves before me, and have faith in me, then will I make weak things become strong unto them” (Ether 12:27).

My prayers are with you this day, my dear brothers and sisters. May you find the peace and comfort and rest that you seek. And may your service bring you joy! Treasure up those things that you will need to draw on. They will be a blessing to you, and you will feel assured as you obtain this promise and witness from the Lord:

“But the Comforter, which is the Holy Ghost, whom the Father will send in my name, he shall teach you all things, and bring all things to your remembrance, whatsoever I have said unto you.

“Peace I leave with you, my peace I give unto you: not as the world giveth, give I unto you. Let not your heart be troubled, neither let it be afraid” (John 14:26-27).

A Peace Rose

I must add one more important verse. Because after all we can do, we must let go and put our trust fully in the Lord. This one is found in Doctrine and Covenants 123:17:

"Therefore, dearly beloved brethren, let us cheerfully do all things that lie in our power; and then may we stand still, with the utmost assurance, to see the salvation of God, and for his arm to be revealed."

O Say Can You?

O Say Can You See?

(Happy Anniversary)

We have been given a beautiful anthem, "The Star-Spangled Banner."

Those citizens who choose not to acknowledge our flag, those who choose division over unity, and those who choose to bring attention to themselves or their special interest groups, rather than accrediting the lives spent to give them liberty; those people are blind. When asked the question, “Oh Say Can You See?, the answer would have to be “No”. They don’t see, and we can all pity them for their blindness.

We cannot wait to teach our children to see until we think that they are old enough to comprehend the whole picture. If we do, we are guaranteed that they will not see. As parents and leaders we have a purpose and a duty to the rising generation. We have to dig back to our roots. Whether we are seventh generation Americans or new to America, we need to know the history of The United States of America and pass that on to our children.

My parents were both born in Europe and chose to become United State’s citizens. I am thankful. Their lives and their gratitude have much to do with my feelings of patriotism for this great Country I call home because of them. I also have my third grade teacher, Miss Nakahara, to thank for instilling in me a love for Country. She taught us "The Star Spangled Banner" and the other great hymns that show reverence for and love of Country and fellowmen. Because of people like them, I am not blind; but, I do see.

Is there ugliness in history? Yes, there can be. But our freedom and our patriotism centers in and commemorates the beauty of our freedoms, gained, regained, and sustained by men and women who love freedom.

When we look back to our beginnings, we know that there really were many who sacrifice their lives and their sacred honor and all their worldly goods to establish this new nation and give us freedom from the oppression we felt from England. They could see. They had a vision of the importance of our freedom, and that America would be a beacon on a hill and a light to the world, in helping many others obtain freedom.

So from before 1776 to 1812, our forbears were willing to keep fighting to maintain the freedom they had secured. England would not let go so reluctantly and kept trying to suppress us in any way possible, with their own forces and with paid mercenaries.

Some argue that Francis Scott Key’s poem, “Defence of Fort M'Henry,” (which was written on 14 September 1814—nearly 200 years ago) should not have become our national anthem, “The Star-Spangled Banner.” While we have other patriotic songs that do serve us well, none is so clear about our history, our mission, and our destiny. The very words that Key used in his poem, “O Say Can You See?”, concerning our flag still waving after our troops were bombarded by the British at Fort McHenry, are the words which echo today. Our flag and our Country have gone through some terrible setbacks, but we are not defeated. The flag is still waving.

Some think that she is not waving triumphantly any more, but that is because they have lost focus on what is most important. They don’t view our history with gratitude, nor do they envision our future with hope. We have to remember that the lenses through which our forebears saw our Country and our future were pricey. Their determination came with the cost of work and constant vigilance.

We owe a debt of gratitude to them and to the many men and women since then who have served to protect us and keep us free. There cannot be any patriotism without gratitude. There may be those who confuse patriotism with prideful arrogance, but patriotism is born of humble gratitude to those who have done for us that which we could not do alone for ourselves, who have given us that which we could not obtain ourselves.

In order to see, we need to remember. We need to remember those who serve and thank them. We need to remember to be good role models and to clearly point out who the true heroes are. 

The coach in the following video made sure that his team had an understanding of that. He helped them see. 

I love our flag and I love our anthem. Why? The reason is clear. It is because I can see that they represent so much more that a piece of cloth and a song. They represent our beginnings, and they represent ever drop of blood spilled from every wounded and dying soldier, and ever tear shed from every soldier’s wife or mother, son or father.

We have been given a beautiful anthem and a precious flag which can serve to bind us together in these The United States of America, if we choose to remember, and if we choose to see. But we need to open our eyes. If we open our eyes, our hearts should follow.

O Say Can You See?

1. 1. Oh say, can you see, by the dawn's early light,
   What so proudly we hailed at the twilight's last gleaming,
   Whose broad stripes and bright stars, through the perilous fight,
   O'er the ramparts we watched, were so gallantly streaming?
   And the rockets' red glare, the bombs bursting in air,
   Gave proof thru the night that our flag was still there.
   Oh say, does that star-spangled banner yet wave
   O'er the land of the free and the home of the brave?
2. 2. On the shore, dimly seen thru the mists of the deep,
   Where the foe's haughty host in dread silence reposes,
   What is that which the breeze, o'er the towering steep,
   As it fitfully blows, half conceals, half discloses?
   Now it catches the gleam of the morning's first beam,
   In full glory reflected now shines on the stream;
   'Tis the star-spangled banner! Oh, long may it wave
   O'er the land of the free and the home of the brave!
3. 3. Oh, thus be it ever, when free men shall stand
   Between their loved homes and the war's desolation!
   Blest with vict'ry and peace, may the heav'n-rescued land
   Praise the Pow'r that hath made and preserved us a nation!
   Then conquer we must, when our cause it is just,
   And this be our motto: "In God is our trust!"
   And the star-spangled banner in triumph shall wave
   O'er the land of the free and the home of the brave!

Text: Francis Scott Key, 1779-1843

Music: John Stafford Smith, 1750-1836

Live with Gratitude: Both Giving and Taking

Live with Gratitude: Both Giving and Taking

Sometimes you can dish it out, but you just can't take it.

How are you at receiving compliments, at accepting praise? Does it cause you undo discomfort when the spotlight is turned to you? Do you soak it in with gratitude? Do you absorb it with pride? Or do you dismiss it in dismay?

Since I am one that is easily overwhelmed, positive attention is sometimes unwelcome, even though it might be very needed. I think that is true for many of us. We want recognition; but, at the same time, we don't want a fuss, nor do we want to feel overwhelmed by compliments that we feel we do not deserve.

Then there is the question of pride in the face of our religious beliefs or core values. If we accept praise, do we equate that with ownership for the good that we have done or the good that unfolds as a result of our actions? Do we question the motives behind the compliment, judging that the giver is insincere or looking for something in return? Do we acknowledge a compliment, understanding that we have been placed in a position to do something good, knowing that we are a small vehicle within a much greater movement of good?

I think that we need to understand that both giving praise and accepting praise are healthy actions and attitudes. Offering praise helps us develop hearts of gratitude, and that's always important. The first part of offering praise, for me, is acknowledging God's hand in all things. All our blessings, relationships, talents, and goodness spring from our Father who gave us life.

Praise God, From Whom All Blessings Flow

Praise God, from whom all blessings flow;

Praise Him, all creatures here below;
Praise Him above, ye heav'nly host;
Praise Father, Son, and Holy Ghost.

Word: Thomas Ken; Music: Louis

Here is a scripture that came to mind in relationship to giving, which certainly can be applied to giving compliments and praise:

“Every man according as he purposeth in his heart, so let him give; not grudgingly, or of neccesity: for God loveth a cheerful giver” (2 Corinthians 9:7).

I believe that we are encouraged to offer sincere praise, both to God and to our fellowmen. If God loves a cheerful giver, certainly He also loves a cheerful receiver.

Sometimes great people doing great things do not want recognition. But at some point, maybe even their humility might appear to be prideful. We are not all capable of doing the same things. The Lord gives us talents severally according to his will (See Gifts of the Spirit). Gifts are given at His discretion for the benefit of the Giver and the recipient. The recipient of God's gifts can then become a giver himself; in turn, the good that we do becomes a blessing to ourselves and to others. In our humility, we might not think that we are anything great or that the things that we do are noteworthy. Be we, as messengers of God, are involved in His goodness; and, when others are witnesses, it may be careless for us to consider their praise as folly and deny the greatness of the actions performed.

Selfless service, in today's world, is out of the norm. But for those who truly love God and neighbor, it is the ideal that we both seek and cherish. While I can understand someone being tired of receiving attention for the good that he does, we all must realize how wonderful it is to be a witness of selfless service. Since we have all been given different blessing and different capacities, the Spirit can guide us all in how we can serve and what our current missions are, if we are willing to ask our Father and listen for His voice.

There are so many opportunities for all of us to be Christ-like. When someone admires our Christ-like actions, maybe we need to step back and look at our own situation through an outsider's eyes. We might also be in awe; not of ourselves, but of what has been accomplished through the grace of God and the gifts He has given us. When we do so, we will be able to accept sincere compliments without arrogance, but joyfully. We will know that the glory goes to God who has given us the will and the moment-by-moment strength to keep going, even when we feel exhausted and inadequate.

When we can both separate ourselves from the glory and involve ourselves in the gratitude, we are in a good position to be a cheerful receiver. Sometimes this might be hard to do, because we are receiving praise when we are intimately aware of our own inadequacies and failures. Maybe we need more support from friends and family to help ease our burdens, and so the compliments we receive just come across as trite phrases. Maybe we resent the compliment because we desire the gift of time and service to help buoy us up in a current challenge. Maybe we even feel that we are a victim, doing much work that we believe others should also be doing. Sometimes, when we do not see our own growth and goodness, we find it difficult to accept what someone else is telling us, because we currently cannot see it. Then we need to develop some trust in the person who is offering praise, trust to accept the compliments with gratitude and trust to ask for help we may need. We really might not want praise because facing our own fears and inadequacies leaves us feeling exposed.

I am certainly glad that praise is part of the gospel of Jesus Christ. I know that even Jesus asked, "Why callest thou me good? None is good, save one, that is, God" (Luke 18:19).

Not only was Jesus announcing His Messiahship, saying that since He is good, He is the Son of God; in this instance, as always, Jesus, as the King of Creation, deferred the glory to His Father. And yet, can you imagine how crumpled we would be if we didn't feel to praise Him and to offer Him our undying gratitude daily, minute-by-minute for His everlasting sacrifice for us?

I think we can all comprehend the importance of being amazed with God and His Son and in offering praise to Them. I think that we all can understand the importance of expressing gratitude to others, and we can acknowledge that there are times that we are in awe of the work that is being done. But can we understand and accept that it is also not just okay but appropriate to accept the praise of others? Instead of being less amazed, I think we should all be more amazed, not only with God, but with what we can and do accomplish as His children. 

With open eyes and hearts, it would be wonderful if we could all give and accept positive words of encouragement and praise. We should really all be more amazed with each other, all the time. We all have tasks that are not easy and challenges that are invisible to others. So it becomes us to accept words of encouragement and praise more graciously, letting those words boost us in the seemingly endless, thankless tasks that we all must perform on a daily basis. We need to become more like little children, who are humble and sincere. In them we witness perfect praise (See Matthew 21:16).

Let us all practice both giving and receiving praise sincerely and graciously. We can learn to accept words of encouragement for what they are, returning the glory to God, and helping others learn to do the same. He has called us to perform special missions. And He is amazing. The work which we do in His name and through His love is also amazing. His grace and His glory and His goodness endures forever! Even when we might feel weary of compliments, I believe that sincere praise from others is only a mere reflection of the love and gratitude they feel for the goodness and glory of God, in which they cannot yet recognize or find full expression. So we can feel gratitude for the goodness that others see in us, and in that goodness, find hope that we are helping others to see God's grace and seek His face.

Life is a wonderful blessing. Praise is a wonderful gift. We are involved in a marvelous work and a wonder! Praise God from whom all blessings flow.