Managing our Demands with our Resources

Managing our Demands with our Resources

In our busy lives, we are constantly engaging in a balancing act. How well we do this highly depends upon active assessment and personal self-control. We have many roles to play and many responsibilities, plus many interests that also vie for our attention. In other words, there are demands. Sometimes it can be overwhelming for us, which might leave us with a feeling of helplessness. But that need not be so.

Demands are just part of the picture. We need to remember that in this balancing act, we also have resources; and, they are many. That is why active assessment and self-control become a vital part of balancing. If we only feel the weight of our demands, then we may blind-side ourselves to the many resources available to us.

So we can begin by making a list of our demands and a list of our resources. This may be the last thing that we feel like doing, because it only feels like one more demand on our time. But that’s not the case. If we allow ourselves this few minutes of planning time, this assessment activity will empower us and give us more time to meet our demands successfully, instead of desperately or despairingly.

One way that writing a list of resources can be most beneficial is that we will see we are not alone, and we will find that we do not need to face our challenges alone. In other words, the Lord is our greatest resource and He will help us, and we can be guided through His Holy Spirit as we turn to Him and ask Him to be our Partner. We will also find that we have support in our spouses and family members and in our friends. As we properly engage each other towards common goals, we will find that our burdens or the weight of our demands will become significantly lighter and far easier to manage.

When we still feel out of balance, we probably are. So what can we do? What is necessary for us to do? Yes, this will also require more assessment. That’s okay. We should be happy to get to know ourselves and to value ourselves enough to make our own lives happier and more pleasant.

When we find that balance is still lacking, we need to shuffle through our demands to see what is most important. It may very well be that we find that we are carrying unnecessary demands. We need to reduce unnecessary demands either by eliminating them or setting them aside for a more appropriate time in our lives. In that way, we will not feel so weighed down, and we will have increased capacity to carry our necessary demands and fulfill them with greater success.

There is another important thing that we can do to find the balance we need. Not only can we reduce unnecessary demands; we can also increase our resources. What are the desired resources that we want in order to meet the demands that we have? Are they available? How can we enlist them? Sometimes, this is as simple as asking someone else for help or giving ourselves time for a restful reprieve. Sometimes, this may require some active learning and hard work, so that we build a new reservoir of available resources in newly gained knowledge and ability. Of course, if this is the case, then we do need to set aside other demands for later, or enlist others for help with those demands, or to allow them the privilege of carrying them for a time.

We need to remember that we all need renewal. The Lord knew that. He gave us the Sabbath day for that. What a great resource. We can set aside many of our particularly draining demands for one day in every week and refuel ourselves. Then we can meet those demands with the promise that we will always have His spirit to be with us if we always remember Him. The very faith that we actively engage in on the Sabbath day provides us with rich renewal and should be considered as a most valuable and incomparable resource. As we sing hymns together, pray and worship, teach, instruct, discuss, and learn, we are strengthened and renewed to meet the challenges of the week.

And then there is the Gift of the Atonement. As we seek the Lord’s approval, acceptance, and forgiveness through the covenants we renew in partaking of the Sacrament, we can be forgiven of our sins and blessed with his Spirit. In other words, He will help us carry our burdens and lighten our loads; our demands will not feel so heavy because He is by our side as our most valuable resource.

Balance is important. Anyone who has ridden a bicycle knows that. And balance takes a certain amount of vigilance or steadfastness. Steadiness in our life will help us to feel calmer and more in control. As we work to achieve the balance that is necessary in our lives, we will see that we are becoming more constant people with emotions that are kept in check, instead of having highs that are too high and lows that are too low. As we seek to manage both our demands and our resources, we will find that we are far better equipped to serve the Lord, to serve our fellowmen, and to feel greater peace and joy in our lives. 

This post was inspired by President and Sister Dixon as they taught in a Zone Conference in San Bernardino, California, for the Latter-day Saint Missionaries who are serving there on 22 November 2016. 

Dealing with Loss

Dealing with Loss

Yesterday I addressed the topic of Pre-Conditioned Discipline: Changing our Song and Dance. The thoughts I shared were prompted by a Relief Society meeting in our Waterman Ward. Brother Goodson is a family therapist from LDS Family Services, and he came to share his personal experiences with us on many topics. Two of the topics were of particular interest to me.

The second topic, which I will address today, is Dealing with Loss. As mentioned in yesterday’s post, it is my experience that Jesus is our best Teacher and He is the One who can best reach every single one of us to help us through our suffering as a result of personal loss (see Matthew 11:28-30). This is mainly so, because He has vicariously taken upon Himself all of our experiences, both joyful and sorrowful (See Alma 7:11-14); and because He loves us dearly.

Knowing that Jesus was A Man of Sorrows and acquainted with grief (See Isaiah 53:3-5) has also been very comforting to me. Enduring my grief with Him and through Him can make me become more like Him. It helps to know that the sadness we experience has a purpose beyond our own misery.

Brother Goodson rightly explained that we all suffer loss: whether it be the death of a loved one, declining health, divorce, or loss of employment. He also said that there are healthful and unhealthful ways to deal with losses.

On a chalkboard, he depicted the past, the present, and the future. Each had a plus and minus sign within its time frame. He explained that if we live in the future, especially if we are concerned about the unknowns of the future, that this will cause us extreme anxiety. While living in our negative past can thwart our current ability to progress. How about with loss? What is the most healthful thing for us to do when we experience loss?

Brother Goodson shared his own experience with loss. While on a family vacation, their seventeen-year-old was driving the car. When there was a turn in the road that she miscalculated, her mother saw it and told her. The daughter over-corrected and the car rolled multiple times. Many family members suffered severe injuries, and thirteen-year-old daughter Megan passed away.

For many years Brother Goodson sorrowed for the loss of his daughter. When he went to beautiful weddings, he would think, “Oh, this could be Megan’s wedding.” At some point, he realized that his own thinking was counterproductive, and he decided to change the pattern of his thinking. So in this same scenario, he know thinks, “This will be Megan’s wedding someday in the glorious future.” With that renewed faith, he looks forward to the future, when through Jesus’s grace we will all be together again.

My husband and I have also dealt with the sorrow of losing a child. In our case, Robby passed away the same day he was born. Though the year following his death was one of extreme sadness for us, it was also one of extreme joy. I felt a greater measure of the Spirit with me constantly, because I chose to turn to the Lord in this time of grief. During the Savior’s extreme suffering in Gethsemane, angels were sent to strengthen him. Still, being in an agony, He prayed more earnestly (See Luke 22:39-46). That’s what we need to do.

I was also given a personal angel to be my companion during this time (see Alma 38:7). This angel was my own son Robby. As I felt him walk with me through that first year, I felt as though I was walking between two worlds. The experience was sweet and joyful.

Brother Goodson stated that the deeper our valleys are, the higher our peaks will be. This can be true if we put our trust in the Lord. And it will be especially true if we hold out faithful until the end. Perfect joy will come in the morning of that perfect day (see Psalm 30:5).

Because Robby was taken so soon from us, we have very few memories of him. This caused me to learn to develop anticipatory memories early on. I know that I will see Robby grow from infanthood to adulthood to Godhood, and I will get to be his mother through it all if I remain faithful now. So there are ways for me to find joy in the milestones of other children, my own and others, knowing that Jesus will right all wrongs and wipe away all tears (see Revelation 21:4). And I marvel at the world that Robby will grow up in (see Isaiah 11:6-9).

I have since suffered many other losses. My younger brother Ed and my older sister Kathy (the two siblings closest in age to me) have both been gone for many years now. We’re also missing my mother-in-law; and, most recently, my own mother passed away. All of these losses have caused me great sorrow. But knowing the Lord’s hand is over all His creations (see Matthew 10:29-31) also gives me hope and encourages me to develop trust, faith, and patience, both for myself and with others.

If someone were to ask what is the hardest loss you’ve experienced? I think that would be an unfair question. The current loss is always the immediately most difficult, and it often brings back the tenderness of sensitivities of the other losses. But I have found that we may grieve differently at different times in our lives and with different losses. Truly, we cannot expect each other to grieve the same. Nor should we ever trivialize another’s loss.

With our losses, we cannot live in the past; but, I find it most helpful to be able to draw from the past and cherish the memories. Doing so can give us greater hope for the future. I have also found it most helpful to me, in experiencing the death of a loved one, when others share memories and impressions of that person with me. Sharing love, light, and hope is healing. We need to remember our baptismal covenants, so eloquently described by Alma, to mourn with those that mourn and comfort those who stand in need of comfort (See Mosiah 18:7-11).

I also think it helps to imagine, much like Brother Goodson does in thinking of his daughter’s wedding. Using our imaginations in constructive ways is a way of developing faith and hope, both in the goodness of our memories and the brightness of our future together. With an eye single to the glory of God, we can move on with a perfect brightness of hope (See 2 Nephi 31:20). 

We must also remember and cherish our testimonies. If there is anything that has helped both my husband and me to move forward even in times of sadness, it is our knowledge of the Atonement of Jesus Christ and the Restoration of the Gospel. We know that because Priesthood Keys have been restored, our separations are temporary; and because we have been sealed in the temple of our God, our family can and will be together forever. This is our testimony, our faith, and our hope. 

Scripture to Ponder:Jesus is the Resurrection and the Life: John 11:21-27. 

Read also: Pre-Conditioned Discipline: Changing our Song and Dance

Not Everything is a Celebration!

Not Everything is a Celebration!

I am increasingly amazed and disturbed by the many people who want to celebrate their weaknesses as successes and encourage others to do so as well. Certainly, we have diverse characteristics and challenges. While we should be able to recognize the accomplishments of others and of ourselves, we should also be able to distinguish when we fall short. It is important to own our weaknesses as weaknesses, instead of boasting that they make us unique; this, in turn, can allow us the ability to recognize our need for the Lord’s help so that we can progress.



No, I am not going to provide a list of examples here; because, I do not want to feel the unleashed backlash from those who would say that I’m judgmental and that I am without feeling. Neither of these things would be true. But I believe that I am discerning in this matter, which is part of practicing good judgment. And as far as feeling, I believe that we all must be open to feeling some shame, so that we can be humble enough to rely on the Lord, who will then help us on our journey to higher ground.



All of us fall short of the glory of God (see Romas 3:23). No matter what our individual trials are, God wants us to measure up, trust in Him, and meet His expectations. Why? Because He is our loving Parent, and His paramount desire is for our happiness and joy and safety (see Moses 1:39). He is the Protectant of our eternal welfare. But even He cannot ensure our safety and deliverance from sin and our own carnal nature, if we abandon His design and ignore His commandments, seeking to pacify ourselves in our own shortcomings, while celebrating them as special needs.



We can make of our lives what we will at every turn with the help of the Holy Spirit and because of the Atonement of Jesus Christ. But we need to acknowledge our dependence on the Lord; and when we fall, seek His help to lift us up again.



In today’s world, we see those who have similar challenges banding together and exercising pride in their togetherness of shared weaknesses. Instead of feeling some shame or uncertainty, which could cause them the necessary humility to initiate change, they believe that their togetherness will make them strong enough to offer endorsement to their struggle; as if their personal struggle is of more value than they are themselves.



But in doing so, they are claiming superiority of their need for sin or someone else’s need to sin. It seems that self-justification is highly prized, while self-evaluation is considered harmful. In the long run, the opposite is most definitely true; and, if we are honest, it is so even in the present. Change is not easy. But it is required if we want to follow Jesus.



There is purpose in the challenges that we face. The Lord has declared for what reason we have been given challenges. While the world would think that our challenges represent part of our eternal nature, it is not so. God wants better for us, and He has provided the way in His Son Jesus Christ.



Moroni, a Book of Mormon prophet was concerned about his weakness in writing. He thought that we Gentiles would mock his writings because of His weakness (see Ether 12:23).



Here is the Lord’s response (found in Ether 12:26-27):



26 And when I had said this, the Lord spake unto me, saying:


Fools mock, but they shall mourn; and my grace is sufficient for the meek, that they shall take no advantage of your weakness;



27 And if men come unto me I will show unto them their weakness. I give unto men weakness that they may be humble; and my grace is sufficient for all men that humble themselves before me; for if they humble themselves before me, and have faith in me, then will I make weak things become strong unto them.



The issue of too much celebration is really an issue of too much pride. If we acknowledge our weaknesses and seek the Lord’s help in humility, He will bless us to overcome through Him and be made stronger to combat our challenges in His strength. Of necessity, this should promote more humility in our hearts, not pride, so that we can continue to approach Him and rely on Him for deliverance.

Sometimes we spend so much time turning to support groups that we forget to turn to the Lord. 


I feel like as a people we think that we have come so far, that we are much more enlightened than those of past generations and dispensations; but, I believe that Samuel the Lamanite is talking to us, as well as to the people of Nephi, when he said in Helaman 13:25-28:



25 And now when ye talk, ye say: If our days had been in the days of our fathers of old, we would not have slain the prophets; we would not have stoned them, and cast them out.



26 Behold ye are worse than they; for as the Lord liveth, if a prophet come among you and declareth unto you the word of the Lord, which testifieth of your sins and iniquities, ye are angry with him, and cast him out and seek all manner of ways to destroy him; yea, you will say that he is a false prophet, and that he is a sinner, and of the devil, because he testifieth that your deeds are evil.



27 But behold, if a man shall come among you and shall say: Do this, and there is no iniquity; do that and ye shall not suffer; yea, he will say: Walk after the pride of your own hearts; yea, walk after the pride of your eyes, and do whatsoever your heart desireth—and if a man shall come among you and say this, ye will receive him, and say that he is a prophet.



28 Yea, ye will lift him up, and ye will give unto him of your substance; ye will give unto him of your gold, and of your silver, and ye will clothe him with costly apparel; and because he speaketh flattering words unto you, and he saith that all is well, then ye will not find fault with him.



Can you see that when we spend our efforts being sympathetic to sin instead of sympathetic to the sinner that we are acting in opposition to the prophets of God? Can you see that when we engage in media expressions of pride that we our offering an endorsement to the activity and not to our individual brothers and sisters?



Can you see from these verses that if we encourage pride in sin that we are setting ourselves up as false prophets and helping the devil in his devices to destroy the rightful destiny of the children of God? I believe this is so even if our desired goal is to gain recognition of being empathetic instead of monetary gain. There are better ways to show our love and concern for each other than to endorse sin. I do not want to be accountable of so great a calamity. I would rather face the anger of the unjustified, prideful masses than face the righteous indignation of the wrath of God.



Our celebration should be in the Lord’s strength, not in our personal weaknesses. He who was tempted beyond measure, yet gave the devil no heed; He who overcame on our behalf, so that He can lift us up and help us overcome our personal struggles with sin; He who offered us life, and that more abundantly, if we turn to Him, trust in Him, love Him, and show that love by keeping His commandment; it is He whom we should celebrate.



We should celebrate Jesus. And in celebration of Jesus’s glorious accomplishment in overcoming sin, we can again celebrate when He helps us on our journey in overcoming our personal sins one step at a time and one day at a time. The celebration must never be in our own weaknesses, but in the Lord’s strength.

Temples Bless Us with Power from on High

Temples Bless Us with Power from on High

It once was said that all roads lead to Rome. But the Roman Empire has since fallen. Today some people think that all road lead to the temple. While we know that the Lord’s Kingdom will not fail, not all roads lead to the temple. In fact, most roads will lead us away from the temple. Temples certainly do dot the earth, and we can even see the Redlands Temple from our own backyard; but, the real road to the temple is discipleship. When we comply to the principles, ordinances, and commandments found in the gospel of Jesus Christ, then we are on the road to the temple.

How do we begin?

We must become acquainted with our Heavenly Father and with His Son Jesus Christ. This is the most important thing we can so. As mothers especially, I feel that it is important to teach our children very young that they are children of God, that He loves them, and that He has expectations for them. 

In the Lord’s Mission Statement, we read, 

“For behold, this is my work and my glory—to bring to pass the immortality and eternal life of man (Moses 1:39).”  

The day that the Prophet Joseph Smith spoke about will soon be here: 

 “If any man does not know God, . . . he will realize that he has not eternal life; for there can be eternal life on no other principle” (Teachings of the Prophet Joseph Smith, 344).  

So it is important to make these things known unto the children of men (2 Nephi 2:8). 

It is interesting to note, that many in the world today think that knowing about God is enough. If they acknowledge that He exists, they think that they have done their part and all will be well with them. They do not realize that like any loving parent, God has expectations for them and of them. Remember, that even Laman and Lemuel believed in God; they knew He existed; they were visited and reprimanded by an angel. But when they expressed unbelief or resentment towards Nephi for his understanding and his relationship with God, 

Nephi asked them, “Have ye inquired of the Lord?” 

And their response was, “We have not; for the Lord maketh no such thing known unto us (See 2 Nephi 15:8-9 ).”  

You see, they failed to become acquainted with God, and they failed to see their relationship to Him. In essence, even though they believed in God, they did not believe in themselves or in God’s love for them.

Satan perpetuates this lie: that none of us can know God. Why? Because, if he can divert us from the path back to our Heavenly Father, he feels that he’s won. Yet we know that because of God’s Plan for us and our Savior’s Atonement for us, They won a long time ago. It is just up to us to choose to be on the winning team, and to invite others to be as well; and as parents, we must begin with our own families.

There are others who have abandoned any belief in God. They claim superiority to those who have faith, saying that we are childish. There are many examples of this type in The Book of Mormon: Another Testament of Jesus Christ. Basically, this group does not want to live by the teachings of the gospel, so it becomes more convenient for them to deny God than to deny themselves of their godlessness.

Also, we live in a day when diversity is the thing to be prized and celebrated. Even though diversity abounds and can add richness to society, I prefer to celebrate our commonality—that we are all children of God, that we have a common parentage through Adam and Eve, and that we have unlimited potential if we make and keep covenants with our Father. I feel it is a shame that there is so much pride in belonging to a special interest group. Our Father and our Savior have invested greater interest in all of us than any special interest group ever will, and They have so much more to offer. Some celebrate their individual struggles as making them more special or more blessed. In Ether 12:27, we learn that God gives unto men weaknesses that they may be humble, and then if they turn to Him in humility and faith, he will make weak things become strong unto them.

So it isn't our weaknesses or our diversity that we should celebrate most; but, we should celebrate the grace of the Lord, that through the Atonement of Jesus Christ we can become stronger, and better, and be made whole.  

I have chosen to give this background information to this talk, because it is of paramount importance that we become acquainted with God; that we help our children to become acquainted through reading, study, prayer, service, devotion, meditation, work, and genuine love and kindness. We cannot maintain a relationship with our Heavenly Father if we become too casual in our devotion.

The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints has been restored in our day, and all the Priesthood power along with it, that can bind us as families for eternity and deliver us to God’s throne spotless, where we can receive a full extension of His grace, and move forward in our progression to become like Him. That is powerful. That is merciful. That is brilliant. And Satan knows it. We live in a time where we can go to the temples and be endowed with power from on high. Why would Satan and his minions allow that? No, he will do all in his power to thwart that from happening. And that is why we see the confusion over the family unit, gender identity, and proper use of priesthood power. 

Did God know this would happen? Of course He did, and that is why He had the prophet and the apostles issue The Family: A Proclamation to the World nearly 19 years ago. As we study that document, we can equip ourselves and our family with the necessary knowledge to combat both personal doubts and assaults from within and without the church. In saying this, I am not suggesting that we argue, fight, or force our opinions down anyone’s throats. That has never been the Lord’s way, and it isn't today. But we do need to have the boldness NOW to hasten the work. 

• As mothers and fathers, there is no better way to hasten the work than to teach our children and to be an example to them. 

• Second to that, let’s hasten the work by being more valiant home and visiting teachers and by magnifying our callings. 

• As individuals, couples, and families, let’s hasten the work by sharing our testimonies, our faith, The Book of Mormon: Another Testament of Jesus Christ, our food, our time, our homes, and our lives. 

The souls of all around us are in danger, and we have the means to help them. 

Let’s point them in the direction of our Heavenly Father, of His Son’s Atonement, of access to their mercy and grace through the first principles and ordinance of the gospel, which are Faith in Jesus Christ, repentance, baptism by immersion for remission of sins by proper priesthood authority, and the laying on of hands for the gift of the Holy Ghost (See Article of Faith 1:4). And we cannot stop there. 

Let’s point them to the temple, and let’s develop the faith to take them there! 

I feel that too many of us are more worried about our rights of worship, and the rites performed in our temples, being taken away from us than we are in making it known that these blessings are available to all and inviting them to join us.

As a young mother, I felt it was important to read the scriptures and the Friend magazine with my children. It was important to teach them to share and to get along, and to rejoice in each other’s accomplishments. It was important for Bob and me to read with them, play with them, and teach them. Bob was very involved in all of this. He made sure that the children always had a good supply of books and music and that our family had wonderful daycations together.

Mother and Father need to work together as a team. This is especially true as the children grow older. Parents offer many prayers on behalf of their children, because they love them and want the best for them. And we point them in the right direction; but, we cannot coerce them or break them like a horse. They are sons and daughters of God, and they will learn to love Him more easily if their earthly parents love them. I would never purport to say that Bob and I were perfect parents, and our children may be quick to agree with that. But I know as they grow older in years and experiences with their own children, they will realize that we did the best we could. (And so did their grandparents.)

Our children were taught the gospel in our home through prayer, scripture study, Family Home Evening, and service to one another. They were prepared to enter the waters of baptism, and each had the personal desire to do so. It is a commandment to parents in the church to teach their children the first principles and ordinances of the gospel so that they will be prepared to be baptized when they are eight-years-old (Doctrine and Covenants 68:25).

Since the Gift of the Holy Ghost will be such a blessing in every facet of their lives, we should never adopt the worldly philosophy to not teach them and let them decide when they are older if they want to learn and convert or not. We can have the greatest influence on them for good while they are still young. And we should not want to deny them the privilege of the Gift of the Holy Ghost.

Besides the family nights and church attendance and teaching our children the importance of the gospel, how can we help them feel the Savior’s love and know how special they are to Him and their Heavenly Father? I won’t answer that question fully, and I really can’t. But The Family: A Proclamation to the World is a great starting point. Plus, the parents in each family unit can pray for direction on how they can most fully implement the teachings of the gospel in their home, what experiences will best help to invite the Spirit, and how they can help their children learn how to recognize the Spirit in their lives. The truer that we become in our own discipleship, the more our children will recognize the importance of developing their own relationships with God.

One of the most important things we can do is teach them about revelation. 

• As children of God we are all born with the Light of Christ and the ability to discern good from evil (See John 1). 

• Also, as children of God, even before being members of the church, we are all entitled to being influenced through the power of the Holy Ghost, which will lead us to truth (See 1 Nephi 10:17 and 2 Nephi 26:13).
  
  
• We should teach them that everyone is entitled to seek personal revelation, and if they are humble and faithful, and are seeking truth, they can expect to receive it.
  
  
• They should understand that only the prophet can receive revelation for the church and for the world; the stake president for the stake; the Bishop for the ward; parents for their families; and individuals for themselves. (We only receive revelation over that which we have stewardship.)

We need to teach them that those things that deny the Christ, or that deny the scriptures and the prophets, or that make all beliefs relative and equal are false doctrines. Truth is eternal; it is what God has established, and it is not what each individual person or civilization redefines it to be. Once we have the Gift of the Holy Ghost, we should seek our Father’s direction continually so that we can be led by truth and chart a proper course in our lives, and lovingly help others to do so as well.

In the temples, we will receive even more light and knowledge, and the personal revelation that we are prepared to receive. In the temples, we are endowed with power from on high. Yet we are not exempt from the struggles of our present-day world, and we will yet fall if we do not cleave unto the truths that we know, and if we do not follow the prophet. We will fall if we embrace the things of the world and let go of the things of God. What an amazing gift we have been given. We don’t just get to go to the temple once for ourselves and then stop. We can and should go back often. That way as we help our kindred dead receive their endowment, so that they can be blessed with power from on high, and so that they can be sealed eternally with their loved ones; as we go back ourselves, our own endowment is renewed in our lives, and we gain more power to resist evil and to pursue good. We also become a blessing to our family and friends, because we are enlightened by the Spirit of Truth, and we are carriers and keepers of the covenant. 

Our family has been blessed bountifully through the Atonement of Jesus Christ and the gifts poured out to us in the temple. What a comfort it is to know that our son Robby has gained eternal life, that he is sealed to our family, and we can all be together after this life if we live worthily. As Bob and I grow older, it’s a comfort to us to know that our marriage was performed by the correct authority in the temple of God, and that it will be sealed by the Holy Spirit of Promise if we keep our covenants to God and to each other. We have been blessed that, so far, four of our children have been endowed and served missions; and that Christine is preparing to do the same. We are blessed that our children have decided to marry in the temple, and that three of them have already had that opportunity; that our grandson Jacob could be sealed to Tom and Whitney on their wedding day, and that our granddaughter Amanda was born in the covenant. Great are the blessings to our family because of the temple; and greater will be the blessings if each family member chooses to remain faithful to their covenants. Agency is paramount in our Father’s plan. But without proper teaching and guidance, there is not proper agency. We need to make known the benefits of the gospel of Jesus Christ to our own children, our own family, and to the world. We have been called upon to hasten the work. Let us do so. Let us take the high road of true discipleship which leads to the temple and back to our Heavenly Father's presence; and, let us invite all to come unto Christ, so that they can do the same.

Does Jesus Fit into your Christmas?

Does Jesus fit into your Christmas? Christians the world over have been taught about the prophecies leading to Christ’s birth: that the promised Messiah was born in a stable and cradled in a manger, that His birth was the greatest gift ever given to the world by God, the Father of us all; but, do Christians remember Jesus on Christmas day? Does Jesus fit into your holiday plans? Does He fit into your life all through the year?

My mother-in-law made each person in our family a Christmas stocking. When I was pregnant with our first baby, she made a stocking that just said “Baby” on it, and it had both pink and white yarn with white as well. This particular stocking evolved into our stocking for Jesus. This stocking became a place where we could deliver messages meant for the Christ-child; we deposited our gifts for Him there. It became a lovely family tradition. It is a way for us to fit Jesus into our celebration. What are some ways your family remembers Jesus at Christmastime?

Our current Bishop has challenged Ward members during the last quarter of the year to reread the Book of Mormon before Christmas. Reading the scriptures is another way that we can bring Jesus into Christmas, or to remember why we celebrate Christmas to begin with. In past years, our family has read the four Gospels during the months leading up to Christmas. And always, on Christmas Eve, the father in our home reads us the Christmas Story as found in the Gospel of Luke. What books of scripture or other inspiring books or magazines do you read to help you remember and to prepare you for Christmas?

Christ’s mission was all about service, giving, sharing, and saving. Every year we have enjoyed holiday baking and sharing our treats with neighbors and friends. One year our family acted as Santa Claus and took little presents to another family each day for twelve days leading up to Christmas. Our children felt the joy and excitement of giving anonymously and the anticipation of doing so without being caught. Other years we have chosen names from giving trees, so that we could help individuals or families receive a nice present for Christmas. My husband and I have been involved in missionary work, and there really is no greater pleasure than teaching people about Jesus and our Heavenly Father’s great love for all of us and watching them accept the gospel of Jesus Christ. What are some activities that you engage in that bring joy to others and the Spirit of Christmas into your heart?

We all have our own holiday traditions, and that is as it should be. We are blessed and entitled to believe and to celebrate as well choose. But Christmastime, for me, is a reminder that Christ does live! He is my Savior. He was born as an infant to Mary, His mother; and, God is His Father. Jesus is God’s Literal and Only Begotten Son. Joseph was a righteous man who acted as a mortal father to our Mortal Messiah, teaching Him about his earthly trade of carpentry and guiding Him in His spiritual development. Christmastime is a time for me to contemplate the great love that our Father in Heaven has for all of us in sending His Son to teach us by precept and example, to show us the way back to Heaven, and to pay the price of our admittance there with His own suffering, death, and resurrection. Christmastime is a time for me to remember that the focus of my life, not just the Christmas season, should always be centered in Jesus Christ. As I focus on Jesus Christ, my vision is not limited, but magnified, as I begin to see His great love for me and to feel my love begin to expand for others.

Today I am recommitting to fit Jesus into my Christmas and into my daily life throughout the year. I will need to make this a daily commitment in prayer each morning, and report back each night to my Heavenly Father. I know that some days I’ll do better than others, but Christmastime reminds me of God’ great Plan of Redemption. Each day I can repent and begin on my journey again. I’m thankful for this powerful gift. So my gift in return is to not give up, but to keep on trying, no matter how poorly or how well I think I am doing. Christmastime for many of us becomes a time to review our year and determine to do a little bit better. My gift for 2014 will be to review how I am doing much more often and to be concerned about charting my course more carefully from day to day. I desire for Jesus to fit into my Christmas now and to my daily routines, and spiritually guided deviations from my plans, each day of the year and coming years. Will I be successful at fitting Jesus into my life? If I do as He did and seek to do my Heavenly Father’s will and not merely my own, I know I will be.

Does Jesus fit into your Christmas? Will Jesus fit into your life in 2014?

A Few Thoughts on the Atonement

I most likely will not understand the Atonement during my mortal life. I don’t understand it, but I accept it. While it is difficult to comprehend anyone suffering to an infinite degree for me and for all humanity, I can comprehend His love for me, because I can feel it. I have felt the Savior’s love for me many times; I have felt His forgiveness and His acceptance. His promise of sending His Spirit and giving His peace is a reality for anyone who seeks after Him.

I Feel My Savior's Love

I feel my Savior's love

In all the world around me.

His Spirit warms my soul

Through ev'rything I see.

Chorus:

He knows I will follow him,

Give all my life to him.

I feel my Savior's love,

The love he freely gives me.

I feel my Savior's love;

Its gentleness enfolds me,

And when I kneel to pray,

My heart is filled with peace.

I feel my Savior's love

And know that he will bless me.

I offer him my heart;

My shepherd he will be.

I'll share my Savior's love

By serving others freely.

In serving I am blessed.

In giving I receive.

Words: Ralph Rodgers Jr., Newell Dayley, and Laurie Huffman
Music: K. Newell Dayley, b. 1939

Text and Music

I even have difficulty contemplating His suffering, His death, and His resurrection. No wonder His disciples fell asleep in the garden of Gethsemane as Jesus suffered for all of us. It was too much to witness; it was too much to take in. So while I know that the sacrament is a time to remember Him and honor His gift to me, often I fall short in my re-dedication and let my mind wander. But He is ever understanding, and He still accepts my meager attempts to covenant with Him, to keep His commandments, and to always remember Him.

The greatest testimony to me of the goodness of Jesus Christ is that I am happiest when I am trying to be like Him, when I am serving others. When I am guided by His love to extend that love to others, it is manifest in my own heart to an even greater degree. This is healing; this is light; this is the love of Jesus.

In my moments of greatest sorrow, I have not been cast off. I have been embraced in the warm of His love. As I look at pictures of Him that express sorrow, I am reminded that He is the Man of Sorrows and acquainted with grief; and to become like him, I must also experience sorrow, but I am not left to do so alone. So even amidst the greatest sorrow, I have felt peace, and I have felt joy.

One of my favorite hymns expresses so clearly my thoughts concerning the Savior’s love for me in extending to me the gift of His Atonement:

I Stand All Amazed

I stand all amazed at the love Jesus offers me,

Confused at the grace that so fully he proffers me.

I tremble to know that for me he was crucified,

That for me, a sinner, he suffered, he bled and died.

(Chorus)

Oh, it is wonderful that he should care for me

Enough to die for me!

Oh, it is wonderful, wonderful to me!

I marvel that he would descend from his throne divine

To rescue a soul so rebellious and proud as mine,

That he should extend his great love unto such as I,

Sufficient to own, to redeem, and to justify.

            (Chorus)

I think of his hands pierced and bleeding to pay the debt!

Such mercy, such love and devotion can I forget?

No, no, I will praise and adore at the mercy seat,

Until at the glorified throne I kneel at his feet.

(Chorus)

Text and Music

Text and music: Charles H. Gabriel, 1856-1932

I love the Lord. I can see this, because I have felt a connection with Him and acceptance from Him. This is because He first loved me. While I do not fully comprehend the Atonement, I do understand and accept that Jesus is the way, the truth, and the life, and I can return to my Heavenly Father because of Him. Truly, I stand amazed. 

Regional Young Women Conference, 3-9-13

3-9-13 Regional YW Conference Held in Rancho Cucamonga

(These are just notes, and they have not been revised.)

Let’s move to Fontana and speak Spanish. The choir is wonderful.

Sister Featherstone and Sister Wixom

What part of the song touched your heart and why? YW--I’m trying to be like Jesus, because that is what I strive to do every day. Primary--I love the part that says “Jesus love you,” because He does. He died for us and we are all living here.

Who can find a virtuous woman? Her worth is far greater than rubies. I thought that we should have worn sunglasses tonight, because of your light.

Teach me to walk in the light—sing and sign.

Oct 6—Sisters can go on missions at 19. Who is excited to serve? YW theme.

Sister Featherstone

Help the girls to love their mommies; tell them to be best friends to their mommies; tell them to listen to their mommies; tell them to be kind.

The Little Princess

If you stay inside the circle, you will be safe.

Every woman is a princess; it is their right. “Is every girl a princess?” Sarah=princess.

Little girl’s dad passed away, and the boarding woman stripped her of everything. Sarah took a piece of chalk and drew a circle around herself. She remembered that she was a princess.

“Didn’t your daddy ever tell you that every girl is a princess?”

You darling girls are all princesses, whether you are short or tall, fat or skinny. You were born to be a queen. You have royal blood flowing through your veins. “Remember who you are.” In premortality, you chose good.

You are chosen because you chose our Heavenly Father’s plan. You promised Him that you would lead virtuous lives. You have made covenants to step out of the world and into His kingdom. Each Sunday, you renew those covenants. You are our future leaders, and the future wives and mommies. Stay on the path and keep your eyes on the temple. Remain virtuous and pure.

10-year-old drew circle around herself. She is not alone. She has Heavenly Father, Jesus, and the Holy Ghost to keep her safe. (Also, we are all here to help her.)

2nd circle—Pray morning and night; read the Book of Mormon every day for 5 minutes; obey standards in For the Strength of Youth; smile. (Serve with a smile)

Circled about by her family, friends, church family, primary, YW, leaders, bishop, unseen angels.

Elisha’s servant was a teenager that was afraid. “What will happen to us.” “I pray that his eyes will be open, for they that be with us are greater than they that be with them.” He saw it.

Because of the Atonement of Jesus Christ, you can be virtuous and pure and return to your Heavenly Father.

Our Father knows us by name. He called Joseph Smith; He called Samuel; He called Moses; and He calls you. He answers your prayers. (Sometimes , not yet, I have something better for you.)

His hand is stretched out still.

The way that we talk to God is through prayer. The way that He talks to us is through scriptures and through prophets.

Arm yourselves; remember you are daughters of Heavenly Father. Remember you are a princess, born to be a queen.

(She felt overwhelmed with having death sons. The Spirit will teach them faith. Sometimes we are all death. We all need to learn through the Spirit and walk in faith.)

Sister Wixom

Sister Featherstone is happy.

Be pretty if you are;
Be witty if you can;
But be cheerful if it kills you.

(Elder Scott—Go to bed with a hanger in your mouth)

Rosemary and Roseanne. (Sister Featherstone and her twin, Rosemary and Rosedbud)

Roseanne

“If I trusted the Lord like I trust this navigation device, my life would be so simple.” We need to trust what is true. When dissonance comes, hang on, and you will have the sweetness of a pure tone.

(Grandpa called them Twinkies)

(The piece of gum that President Monson shared; the little girl gave half a piece back. He keeps it in his desk.)

She said her heart skipped a beat and that tears streamed down her face when the call was issued to be the Primary President. She knew that she would not be alone in this calling.

Elder Hales asked, “What’s that taproot that is going to anchor a child in the wind?” Know where you’ve been, why you are here, and where you are going.

We are baptized; the boys get the priesthood; the girls get the power and the blessings of the priesthood as well; etc. “I will stay on the path back to my Heavenly Father.”

Iron rod=Word of God. Word of God=Jesus Christ.

We voted to come to this earth. We did not flinch when we made that decision. We shouted for joy, because we knew who we are and that we could make it back to Him. Because of the Atonement of Jesus Christ, we can always come back to the path.

Lagoon—concerts—dresses to concerts at Lagoon. Chocolate nut sundae on a pink chiffon dress. She bent down and put her arm around that five-year-old boy. She looked up at her date and said, “Don’t worry, he’ll buy you another one.” This came from inside of her. She was 100%. Every morning prayer was part of her day. She knew that she was a valued daughter of God. Because she knew who she was, she could handle every situation. The scriptures were part of her life. They filled her with the words of Christ. She internalized it, and was becoming more like Him.

She wanted to be popular. “Jeff, what’s the secret. How do you have lots of friends?” Number one, be kind to everyone. Call them by name, and say hello. Say hello to those who don’t have many friends.

Obituary, “Kind.” Look at others in the eye when you see them. Empathize. How do they feel? Love them for who they are. Pray for Heavenly Father’s love. God will give you a portion of His love, and then you can love someone else; you can even love your enemies.

“Be of good cheer.” Regardless of trials or where our paths take us. Her niece was killed in a car accident when she was 19. Our challenges are all different. Her sister is of good cheer, because she knows her Savior Jesus Christ, and she has turned to Him when she’s needed Him.

Heavenly Father, am I really thy daughter? Do you know my name? Watch what happens. You will be flooded with His love; you will know He knows your name. Stand as a witness and take upon yourself Him name. Do His will. Pray to know His will. Heavenly Father has a plan for all of us.

Elder Higham

He has never spoken took such a large group of sisters. Tenderness

“We are daughters of our Heavenly Father who loves us, and we love Him.”

Missionaries teach that we are children of God.

Story from Sister Featherstone’s father-in-law 40 years ago.

Eagle’s egg put in with the chicken. The eagle was raised as a chicken. “Thou art an eagle, fly.” He jumped off the farmer’s arm and acting like a chicken. As long as he saw the chickens, he acted like a chicken. Once he took him away to a high point, he looked to the sun rays and he flew.

The world would have us down scratching in the dirt, but our destiny is much better than that.

Virtue=of good character, clean, pure

Proverbs 31:10—virtuous woman.

Heavenly Father loves us; He wants us to be happy; virtue is one way for us to be happy.

“Charity never faileth.”

D&C 121 Bowels full of charity; virtue garnish thought; confidence wax strong in sight of God. Doctrine of Priesthood distill. Holy Ghost constant companion. Etc.

Scepter=symbol of loyalty.

Jesus Christ lives; He is the Savior of the world; He knows you and loves you; “I invoke His blessings upon you.” You will find a renewed happiness in your life that will be refreshing to you.

The Sacrament, A Sacred Memory

This Do in Remembrance of Me

I have always equated the sacrament with a sacred memory. "This do in remembrance of me," is what the Lord has told us to do. When we attend Sacrament meeting, we should do so wearing a broken heart and a contrite spirit. As we do so consistently, we will receive His image in our countenances. We commemorate the Lord's Last Supper and His Atonement in our behalf. We also commemorate our baptism and renew our covenants with Him, and we promise to "always remember Him." In exchange, He promises that we shall always have His Spirit to be with us, and if we continue faithful to the end, we will obtain Eternal Life.  One of the most important words in the scriptures is "remember." Another one is "hearken." Let us hearken unto the counsel of the prophets, and let us always remember who we are and what God expects us to do. Also, let us remember Jesus and never forsake Him.

Please read Elder Oak's talk: 

Sacrament Meeting and the Sacrament

This small article addresses so many simple ways that we can prepare. Following are my ideas paraphrased from what I have read and what I understand: 

I. Because the sacrament is so important, there is absolutely no other meeting in the church which is more  important. All the details of the meeting should be planned in order to preserve the dignity of the sacrament.

II. There needs to be personal preparation for the sacrament to have efficacy in our lives. Our day-to-day thoughts and actions should reflect that we remember Him; we should come with a broken heart and a contrite spirit: meaning we should feel sorrow for our short-comings and feel humble enough to ask the Lord's help yet again; we also should feel sorrow for the trials and sufferings of others; and we should ever be aware of the Lord's sacrifice, atonement, and resurrection on our behalf, that can make us at one again with Him and with our Heavenly Father. We should arrive to the meeting early and be seated and relaxed and prepared to worship. 

III. Our attitude, our dress, and our personal choice to be reverent are important. These things can aid in our concentration or distract from it; they can also provide an atmosphere that helps other people feel either worshipful or distracted.Our focus should be on the Savior during the sacrament, and we should remain attentive, reverent, and respectful throughout the meeting, not giving way to things that would distract us from our purpose--to worship and to be edified by the Spirit.

IV. The Sacrament is important. We must learn that it is. We must remember that it is. The Sacrament is about our sacred memories: memories of the Lord's sacrifice; memories of our covenants and the Lord's promises; memories that because of Jesus, there is no other sacrifice necessary, except for us to remember Him and present our will to Him so that He can help us return to our Father. If we take the sacrament worthily, we will be built upon Christ's firm foundation and be able to withstand the wiles of the devil. Also, Jesus will forgive us and baptize us with fire and the Holy Ghost.

V. The Bishop or the Presiding Priesthood Authority oversees the administration of the sacrament. Members must maintain a level of righteousness that is compatible with participating in the sacrament. Young men who prepare, bless, and pass the sacrament must remain clean and worthy to do so.

I will ever be thankful to the young men of the Aaronic Priesthood for their diligence in being clean in these trying time. I witnessed a most beautiful scene. When my sister was undergoing cancer treatment and could not be to church, I was with her at her home when she had returned from the hospital from an intense round of chemotherapy. Two priests, under the direction of the Bishop, came to her house to offer her the sacrament. They did so most graciously. After which, Kathy took the time to thank them, and she also taught them. She told them that they came to her home in the Savior's place to offer her his Sacrament. Her sincerity and clarity, even in her weakened condition, touched the hearts of those young men deeply, and I would not be surprised if they remember it always. 

I also remember that after being bed-bound for six weeks in a pregnancy, I was delighted to return and take the sacrament. Even though our little one only lived 2 1/2 hours, I had missed taking the sacrament, and it was a necessary part of my healing. I do not think that most people know that the sacrament not only helps us recover from sin, but also from sorrow, misunderstandings, and deep hurts and scars. 

I know that my comments do not compare to that of an Apostle of our Lord Jesus Christ. I am thankful for Elder Oaks teaching and testimony. I am also thankful that I have been blessed through the sacrament for as long as I can remember. I am not nearly reverent or gracious enough, but I am striving to be. As I have written before, "The Lord's sacrifice for all of us is beyond comprehension. He loves us all so much. For me, Sacrament meeting is about honoring His sacrifice and seeking to align myself to do His will. It is a time when we are to seek edification and fellowship." I hope that I will do better at showing my love for Heavenly Father and for His Son Jesus Christ through preparing more fully before taking the sacrament. I also hope that I will be a member that contributes to the reverence of the chapel and one who helps others to invite and feel the Spirit in their lives.

This I say, in the name of Jesus Christ, Amen. 

The Atonement is a Trust Fund

The Lord set up a trust fund for all of us when He atoned for our sins. If you set up a trust fund for your child, he can collect those funds when he is 18 or 25 as the case may be. But he will have to prove that he is who he says he is. The Atonement is like a trust fund. It is set up for us to use in order to receive a remission of our sins, but we have to prove who we are, that we are sons and daughters of Jesus in order to have access to those funds or to His forgiveness, His redeeming blood. Why not? He suffered greatly to set up that fund. So we have access to that fund through the first principles and ordinances of the gospel, and through continued allegiance to him as our Father, since we took His name upon us. Then if we are faithful to the trust and rely on His atonement throughout our lives, we are promised that we will gain all that our Father has. God has a right to set conditions on this trust fund. If you gave your only Son as a Scapegoat for all of humanity, you would place conditions upon it as well. But that doesn't make His love conditional; it just makes it so that He does not force us to love Him. He gives us the choice.